Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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