the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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