dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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