JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Randomize
