I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize