this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
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He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
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We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
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