So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize