So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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