In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
This is my gift to your gina
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
