If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I understand Curling. That high.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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