Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
