The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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