So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I am midnight drunk by noon
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Randomize
