I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
