I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize