Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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