I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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