love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
