You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
