Will you blow on my dice?
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
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