drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize