Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
