So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
