officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
