u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
You're earring is so big in my mouth
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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