If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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