I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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