I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
