who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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