It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Sorry about my life...
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Randomize
