I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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