whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
