Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize