I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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