My room smells like vodka and shame
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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