i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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