No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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