I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
you win again, gameday.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
