Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize