one two three fourrrrnication!
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize