May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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