go do what you do best...puke behind churches
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize