you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
