The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
