Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
