It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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