? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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