Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
