I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
