I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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